Gold Stars and a Box of Cash
How one client's idea of motivation became a windfall AND a nightmare all at once.
My radar alarm should have been pinging like crazy that something was slightly “off” about this client when I first met with Tonya. She was a petite woman in her 30’s who lived in an expensive high rise and worked in the medical field. Our first encounter was held in a meeting room in her apartment building, which was quite unusual. I would normally meet with clients in their homes, especially since I would have to go through their kitchen. But since I wasn’t doing the cooking in her home, she thought best to meet in a frequently used room in her building. I was confused when she met me in the lobby and took me there instead of her actual apartment. The meeting itself commenced as usual with the obligatory questions of likes, dislikes, etc. While discussing grocery stores, Tonya stated that she prefer I shop at organic markets. “No problem” I stated, as there were 2 that I shopped regularly. She agreed to both. She then took me downstairs to meet the concierge who would let me into her apartment, as she wasnt feeling safe with giving me a key to her place just yet. We set a day for me to deliver the first round of meals and settled on a weekly service schedule.
On the first day I delivered her meals, the concierge let me into her place and I put everything away in the fridge, as well as leaving her a lovely bouquet of flowers and a card welcoming her to a new stress-free life of eating healthy. I left her an invoice as well as a sheet with the menu and a rating system I created for her to fill out. I always asked each client to fill out the rating sheet as they were trying the meals. That way I would have a better idea if I was hitting it out of the park or making them unhappy with the service. I always said “Since I’m not here with you while you are eating each thing and asking “So, What’d ya think?!”, which would be very annoying, I need you to tell me honestly how each meal rated and also, if you didn’t like something to tell me expressly what it was about the dish you didn’t like. For instance, it was too bland, too spicy, you realized you hate salmon. You know, things like that to help me know your palate better.” Tonya said she would absolutely let me know in no uncertain terms how the meals were working for her. I also realized that she had forgotten to leave me payment (which was not unusual for new clients the first time I cooked for them) so I sent her an email that evening. She replied that night after she returned from work and after she had tried a number of the meals, taste testing each item. First she said that the meals all tasted amazing and she was so thrilled with the service. She thanked me for the card and asked me to “never bring flowers into my apartment again because they harbored bacteria and disease”. I had never heard of anything like that before and imagined the beautiful bouquet in the garbage, but would honor her wishes. She also asked if I could swing by the next day to pick up her payment as she wanted to pay me in cash going forward and would have a “system in place” she wanted me to use the next week when I dropped off the meals. I emailed her back and told her I would.
When I met her the next day at her place she took me up to her apartment to give me payment and to explain how she was going to pay me going forward.
First, she showed me the rating system I left her. There were notes written next to each item (as I had asked) with a letter corresponding to her level of happiness with the meal. “A” was explained as “I’ve never tasted something SO delicious and I would eat this everyday!” “B” was “This was good and I’d like it regularly”. “C” was “It was just OK, but not my fave”. “D” was “I HATED this and NEVER want to see it again on the menu”. This was my rating system I included on the menu sheet. She had given me all “A”’s” on each thing! I was very happy I had wowed her right off the bat. Next she handed me the amount due in an envelope filled with cash. I told her I usually didn’t accept cash and she explained that was how she wanted to pay going forward. She also said she had given me a $100 bonus in there as well for the great job I did. I thanked her and told her I was looking forward to the following week’s cook for her. She said she was, too. She handed me a key to the apartment stating that she could “trust” me now and that I could simply let myself in.
The following week, after she approved the new menu, I went to her place to deliver that weeks meals. On the kitchen counter was a typed letter for me. It read as follows:
“Hello chef! I have devised a plan for you going forward that, I think, will help motivate you to work even harder on my meals to make them perfect. Please see the spreadsheet I created for how I plan to bonus you out for your hard work. Also, please notice the decorative box on the counter. It is filled with $700 in various size bills and will always be set up with $700 each time you deliver. First, please take out for the amount of the invoice and round up to the nearest dollar amount. Next, see the spreadsheet I will leave for you each week to find out if you get EXTRA cash for doing a job well done. Please take the bonus cash from the box as well.”
I looked at the sheet of paper laying next to the cash box. The menu from last week was laid out in a grid with the name of each dish in the horizontal columns. Four vertical columns ran across the top of the page with headings using my rating system but listed as “A - take $50”, “B - Take $40”, “C - Take $30” and “D - take $0”. Next to those four columns was another vertical row titled “Shopped at Whole Foods - Take $100” followed by another that said “Shopped at Mom’s Organic - Take $50” Lastly, the whole thing was covered in gold star stickers next to each meal as well as butterfly stickers sporadically (or strategically) placed around the edges. She had spent a great deal of time creating this.
She had given me all A’s for the five dishes I created for her. So, I was to take an extra $250! She also marked that I had shopped at Whole Foods so I was to take another $100! The bonus was as much as the invoice! I was in shock to say the least. No client had ever bestowed that kind of tip on me before, and honestly it felt weird to be accepting this. That night I texted her to thank her for the bonus but let her know that this was most certainly NOT necessary and that I always cooked my best no matter what. She texted back saying that this is how she wanted to do things and she wouldn’t take no for an answer. It all felt very strange to me. My husband thought so as well.
The following weeks went by with her spread sheets generally giving me mostly A’s with some B’s here and there. When I had to shop at Mom’s she would leave me a note on the following weeks spreadsheet stating that she prefered Whole Foods and that is why she paid such a bigger bonus for the Whole Foods shopping. I explained to her numerous times that if Whole Foods didn’t have an item I needed then I would try to source it at Mom’s. She was never happy with that answer.
Months had gone by and I was making an extra $1000 or more a month from her tips. Then, the day came when the Whole Foods store was closed for some reason unknown to me. I went to Mom’s next to get her items but their protein section was nearly empty. Panicked, I then drove to Giant grocery store to source the meats there. I made sure to purchase only organic meats and went to my kitchen to cook. I delivered her meals at the end of the day and went home.
That night Tonya sent me a scathing email stating how upset she was that I didn’t go out of my way to travel to another area of town to get all her groceries at Whole Foods. “You would think, Chef, that with me paying you an extra $100 to shop where I NEED you to shop that that would be enough incentive for you to travel to anywhere on God’s green earth to get me my groceries! But, I guess you don’t want this job enough or care enough about my needs. So, for that reason, I won’t be needing your service any longer. Please return my keys tomorrow to the concierge. I have told them you will be bring them tomorrow and I will leave you an envelope with today’s invoice total only. Best, Tonya.”
To say I was blindsided would be an understatement. I was so upset, not at all from losing the extra cash that I never asked for, but by the level of privilege that she demanded. I dropped off the keys the next day and left her a note inside the envelope I had put them in only saying, “Best to you Tonya”. The concierge handed me the envelope of cash and I left, never stepping foot in that building again.
Until next week, Thanks so much for following along on this journey! If you enjoy Secrets and Spice please make sure you subscribe to get each weeks story emailed directly to you.
Also, if you would like access to any of my recipes please consider a paid subscription. It’s one of the perks of becoming a paid supporter. (it’s only $5 a month or $50 for the year)
Oh, and please share these stories with those you think might enjoy the read.
Thank you again,
- Shirlé
**All names, places and occupations have been changed to protect the identity of all clients.
Please leave a comment or two…I’d love to hear from you!
A Shout Out to this Weeks Paid Supporters:
A very special shout out to the following paid subscribers:
Robinlee Garber, Chef Lynn Warlick Wells, Jake Brokaw, Miyuki Furtado and Spanky Wilson, . A special shout out to new paid subscribers Myra Ruppe Schwartz, Lisa Deemer Sethi and Claudia L Sanders, Laurel Estabrooks and Leela Montella,! Thank you all soooo much for your support!
-Leela is a person I have known since kindergarten. She has made a lovely life for her and her family and I love watching her kids success stories.
-Myra is an old NC friend who I recently got to see here in beautiful Lisbon with her partner Scott. Maybe someday they will become expats in this fair land.
-Robinlee is a childhood friend and all around renaissance woman, living and playing music in Chicago.
-Chef Lynn is a fellow Personal Chef buddy and owner of Thyme Well Spent, Personal Chef Service, based out of Greensboro NC. When not cooking for clients or food styling for cookbooks, she can be found hobnobbing with tastemakers and culinary shakers all over the country.
-Jake and his wife Brigitte have long been huge supporters of my cooking and are also huge supporters of the arts in Baltimore, Maryland. Jake also has an Orthopedic practice I have had to use a few times.
-Miyuki has been a lifelong friend and bandmate of mine from days long past. He’s also one of the best fathers and husbands I know and has raised one of the coolest kids, his daughter Mino along with his sweet wife Tricia. Miyuki currently plays music in his Alt-Country band, Divining Rod. You can listen to Divining Rod out on all music platforms. (Chef Lynn, I think you would LOVE his music!)
-Spanky has been a huge supporter of my cooking from my NC days. When not fire fighting you might find Spanky hiking the Appalachian trail.
-Lisa has been in my life since the early 90’s. She’s a huge music supporter and a lover of all things delicious.
-Claudia is an old friend from my days in North Carolina. I met Claudia at a pig pull back in 1998, when I first moved to Chapel Hill. Since then, Claudia has started a successful Personal Chef business, Good Intentions Personal Chef Service in the Hillsborough area, as well as serving the Durham and Chapel Hill area.
-Laurel Estabrooks is a new expat friend, recently becoming a Portuguese resident. Parabens!! Someday I hope to meet up face to face. Muito Obrigada Laurel!!
Thank you all sooo much for supporting me in this endeavor. I am truly grateful for you.
**************************************************************************************
Secrets and Spice - A Personal Chef's Memoir is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber.
Subscribed
As a free subscriber, you will receive a weekly story in your inbox. If you however would like to support this endeavor by becoming a paid subscriber you will get to participate in a number of unique ways. You will have the ability:
To have a personal Q&A session with me about that weeks story.
To get tips and tricks regarding cooking from me. Maybe even some recipes.
For serious chefs considering this line of work, you will be able to ask questions concerning your own Personal Chef service, or how you might go about starting a PC service.
And lastly, you will get a shout-out letting folks know you support my writing, and have my undying gratitude!
Why subscribe as a paid subscriber?…well, as Holly Whitaker states on her blog, Recovery, “This is one of my jobs, and I put a lot of work into it. I believe in an ethos of paying people for their work (especially in recovery spaces, where work is undervalued and, therefore, resources are limited). If you love this newsletter, get value out of it, and believe in paying people for their work, consider a paid subscription.”
I feel the same as an artist (and a veteran, always underpaid, musician), that this is one of my jobs. A calling, even. So, if you value the work I am doing here please consider a paid subscription. And Thank You!